The Intro into SELF-LOVE
The term ‘self-love’ is frequently tossed around now-a-days, but what exactly does it mean? “It is a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological and spiritual growth.” The most important relationship in life is the relationship we have with ourselves. It’s how we view ourselves and how we feel about ourselves. So, how exactly can one incorporate ‘self-love’ values into your everyday life to the point where it becomes automatic? This is the question I asked myself often on my continuous journey to find my true and happy self. Notice how I said continuous because the journey is never ending. And for some of you the journey may just be beginning.
There are many different ways to describe what “self-love” is and it can mean something different to each and every person. When we truly love ourselves, we acknowledge and accept every flaw instead of feeling insecure about them. We know our strengths, but we are also aware of our weaknesses. One will say it is the pedestal you put yourself on top of, another might say it is the road to finding true and meaningful happiness within yourself. These are both correct, but there are plenty of other ways to describe it. Practicing acts of self-love will help you make healthier choices in life because you will be making choices based on your needs and well-being. This article is going to discuss the journey and importance of self-love and how it will change your view on life.
The biggest and first step into your ‘self-love’ journey is to forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for anything that you put up with in the past and anything you may have settled for. Forgive yourself for not saying “no” in a particular situation to please the other person. Forgive yourself for all the times you doubted your strength and questioned your self-worth. This is an important step because dwelling on the past will only slow down the process of becoming your better, future self.
Yes, having ‘self-care’ days is an act of ‘self-love’. I love having my “self-care” or “Mariah” days because it is a time where I’m not stressed or feeling pressured because I have to go to work or do anything extraneous. I like to make at least an hour-two hours A DAY for myself. This includes doing a skincare routine, or reading a chapter of a book, or watching a new documentary on Netflix. After having a long day, it is something I can always look forward to. Then, I like to reserve ONE FULL DAY a week to do all things for ME. This can include getting my nails done or my eyebrows done and even just going to the store to wander around and see what I can find. There are so many activities that can give us that confidence boost and elevate our moods, it is about finding what makes you happy and to not make excuses as to why you can’t do it or find the time. There should always be enough time for You in your schedule.
Self-care is also about what we are feeding our minds and our bodies. Yes OF COURSE it is okay to have a cheat meal or a cheat day, but constantly eating processed and unhealthy foods can take a toll on your mental and physical health. In a study done by the International Journal of Food Sciences and Nutrition, revealed that “adults who consumed more unhealthy food were also more likely to report symptoms of either moderate or severe psychological distress than their peers who consume a healthier diet.” I also tend to find that watching or reading certain things (like the NEWS) too often can have an effect on my mental health and can put me into a ‘funk’. Read and watch things that stimulate your mind in a positive way.
Be mindful of you and your feelings. I know I can say that not everyday is a good day. There will be days that are bad and when those days happen, it’s good to get into the habit of accepting those bad days because there will be a new day tomorrow, with different feelings and a different energy. It is a clean slate. The people who are mindful of their feelings are in control of themselves and are strong. They know what they want and they know what they deserve. This can also be done by constantly saying or reading affirmations such as, “I am beautiful.”, “I am proud of myself.”, “I am worthy of all good things.”, “I am love and love fills me.”, and so many others. It also helps to write them down!
So, if tomorrow is your first day on your journey to find ‘self-love’ start by saying an affirmation to yourself in the mirror and end with a statement of gratitude “Thank you for another day.” This journey requires kindness and patience with yourself because once you are able to reap love within yourself, so much love will then be attracted to you.
“Self-love means giving yourself what your body, brain, and soul needs for the marathon that is life. It isn’t hedonism and it isn’t chasing a physical or emotional high. The practice of self-love is the practice of nourishing yourself.”